By Royna Hill, West Suffolk Crematorium Manager.
West Suffolk Crematorium has been open for 20 years in August and to mark this special occasion we will be holding a Funeral Fayre” on Saturday 1st August from 10.30am onwards. This event is intended to be a friendly and informative day, at which members of the public can learn about all aspects of the funeral business, from a wide range of professionals who will be attending.
We will have exhibits of funeral transport – from the past and present – along with a variety of coffins and caskets, showing the latest styles and trends. There will be professional advice from, for example, CRUSE Bereavement Care, St Nicholas Hospice, along with many of our local Funeral Directors.
But we want the day to be informal and uplifting, and will therefore have displays of woodcarving, calligraphy and masonry as well as a display from a local Falconer. There will be refreshments available throughout the day.
During the day we will run small informal tours of the crematory, where you will be able to see what happens once the curtains have closed – this will help to allay fears and dispel the myths.
Weather permitting, we also plan to hold a series of small, informal memorial services in our gardens where we can remember those we have lost, and these services will be lead by a number of our local ministers and officiants.
We hope to see you there!
Tuesday 21 July 2009
Sunday 19 July 2009
Funeral Fayre at The West Suffolk Crematorium
The West Suffolk Crematorium will be holding a funeral fayre on Saturday August 1st.
Details from Royna Hill (manager) to follow but with my insider info :-) I can reveal that amongst other things there will be stands from various funeral directors, horse drawn hearses, coffin displays (both traditional and alternative) floral tribute displays and demonstrations.......and "behind the scenes" tours!
More info to come!!!
Details from Royna Hill (manager) to follow but with my insider info :-) I can reveal that amongst other things there will be stands from various funeral directors, horse drawn hearses, coffin displays (both traditional and alternative) floral tribute displays and demonstrations.......and "behind the scenes" tours!
More info to come!!!
Graveyard etiquette - from the BBC
Claims that tourists have been picnicking on a war grave in Scotland have prompted a hostile reaction from some. But what are the rules for behaviour at a burial ground?
How should you act where the dead are under foot?
When it comes to visiting burial grounds, many people are unsure exactly what is suitable behaviour. While some attend to pay their respects or remember lost loved ones, many visit cemeteries and churchyards for less profound reasons - a leisurely walk, to take in the view or just out of curiosity.
There are codes of conduct - it's just not always clear what these are.
When, last month, a church in Wimbledon, south London, invited motorists to park in its grounds, pictures of cars tightly packed next to headstones prompted outrage in the press. This week, visitors to Culloden Battlefield, near Inverness, were criticised for picnicking where soldiers had died in the 18th Century.
Burial ground etiquette is governed by a combination of convention, common sense and the law - both local and national.
The 1977 Local Authority Cemeteries' Order, which applies to England, Scotland and Wales, sets down some basic laws of conduct. Creating a disturbance in a churchyard, committing a nuisance, wilfully interfering with burials or graves, or playing games or sports, are all finable offences.
But the public are rarely aware of the order and, to complicate matters further, other rules are set out in bye-laws - locals laws that vary from place to place.
Even so, there has always been an underlying understanding - whether you're a mourning relative or just a visitor, says Peter Francis, spokesperson for the Commonwealth War Graves Commission (CWGC).
Unruly children
"The correct behaviour almost dictates itself - most of it is common sense. Visitors are expected to be responsible, dignified and have a respectful manner," says Mr Francis.
The CWGC cares for hundreds of thousands of graves and encourages the act of remembrance. Mr Francis lumps playing football and having a picnic together as "inappropriate" behaviour when at a CWGC site. Whether "everyone knows" these rules, as he claims, could be up for debate.
Certainly, not everyone adheres to the unspoken guidelines. And the CWGC's current efforts to host school visits has not pleased everyone.
One recent letter to the commission complained: "[The children] ran about shouting and chasing each other around the graves and climbed all over the monument… I fear before long the cemeteries will become some sort of theme park for children's war games."
While games and dining are out - touching headstones and plaques is acceptable, says Mr Francis.
"[They] were made to be read and looked at - to commemorate lives. It is just a case of knowing when to draw the line."
But Lee Snashfold, director of Kensal Green Cemetery, in London, says the line between what is inappropriate or not changes with society's shifting values.
'Outrageous behaviour'
"There are three types of rules. Firstly the bye-laws, secondly the cemetery regulations at each site," explains Mr Snashfold. "Then there are the rules of etiquette - common sense - that's anything that is an inconvenience to the people using the services."
He cites the example of how changes to shop opening hours have had a knock-on effect on how people remember the deceased. Shops used to close mid-week, and families would take the time to visit dead relatives, says Mr Snashfold.
"I suppose there's been a shift away from the tradition, but the underlying expectations and respect is there. It may have eroded over the years, but it will always be there."
Sometimes, though, decorum has clearly been forgotten.
"I've seen some outrageous behaviour," says Mr Snashfold. "There was once a photographer and model who were taking photos without permission. He was clicking away as a service was going on."
Even those who might be expected to know the customs inside-out, can find they have misjudged society's views. When, in June, St Mary's church, in Wimbledon Village, charged tennis fans £20 a day to park in its burial ground, it justified the decision by saying the graves were 200 years old or more. No living relatives would be offended, it said. It also gave the money to charities.
But faced with public distaste, the church called a swift halt to the scheme.
No matter how much has time has elapsed it should not affect conduct, says Canon Tim Barker.
"Churchyards are still special places - consecrated ground - whether a grave is a year old or from the 1840s, whether there are living relatives or not."
Some churchyards do fall into a state of disrepair, in Horncastle, Lincolnshire, a town church has become an antiques centre. The surrounding graveyard is now used as a public area, so the accepted conduct is more lenient.
"If a churchyard is closed for burials it may affect the public's view," says Canon Barker, "But most people know it is still somewhere to be respected and naturally adapt their behaviour."
How should you act where the dead are under foot?
When it comes to visiting burial grounds, many people are unsure exactly what is suitable behaviour. While some attend to pay their respects or remember lost loved ones, many visit cemeteries and churchyards for less profound reasons - a leisurely walk, to take in the view or just out of curiosity.
There are codes of conduct - it's just not always clear what these are.
When, last month, a church in Wimbledon, south London, invited motorists to park in its grounds, pictures of cars tightly packed next to headstones prompted outrage in the press. This week, visitors to Culloden Battlefield, near Inverness, were criticised for picnicking where soldiers had died in the 18th Century.
Burial ground etiquette is governed by a combination of convention, common sense and the law - both local and national.
The 1977 Local Authority Cemeteries' Order, which applies to England, Scotland and Wales, sets down some basic laws of conduct. Creating a disturbance in a churchyard, committing a nuisance, wilfully interfering with burials or graves, or playing games or sports, are all finable offences.
But the public are rarely aware of the order and, to complicate matters further, other rules are set out in bye-laws - locals laws that vary from place to place.
Even so, there has always been an underlying understanding - whether you're a mourning relative or just a visitor, says Peter Francis, spokesperson for the Commonwealth War Graves Commission (CWGC).
Unruly children
"The correct behaviour almost dictates itself - most of it is common sense. Visitors are expected to be responsible, dignified and have a respectful manner," says Mr Francis.
The CWGC cares for hundreds of thousands of graves and encourages the act of remembrance. Mr Francis lumps playing football and having a picnic together as "inappropriate" behaviour when at a CWGC site. Whether "everyone knows" these rules, as he claims, could be up for debate.
Certainly, not everyone adheres to the unspoken guidelines. And the CWGC's current efforts to host school visits has not pleased everyone.
One recent letter to the commission complained: "[The children] ran about shouting and chasing each other around the graves and climbed all over the monument… I fear before long the cemeteries will become some sort of theme park for children's war games."
While games and dining are out - touching headstones and plaques is acceptable, says Mr Francis.
"[They] were made to be read and looked at - to commemorate lives. It is just a case of knowing when to draw the line."
But Lee Snashfold, director of Kensal Green Cemetery, in London, says the line between what is inappropriate or not changes with society's shifting values.
'Outrageous behaviour'
"There are three types of rules. Firstly the bye-laws, secondly the cemetery regulations at each site," explains Mr Snashfold. "Then there are the rules of etiquette - common sense - that's anything that is an inconvenience to the people using the services."
He cites the example of how changes to shop opening hours have had a knock-on effect on how people remember the deceased. Shops used to close mid-week, and families would take the time to visit dead relatives, says Mr Snashfold.
"I suppose there's been a shift away from the tradition, but the underlying expectations and respect is there. It may have eroded over the years, but it will always be there."
Sometimes, though, decorum has clearly been forgotten.
"I've seen some outrageous behaviour," says Mr Snashfold. "There was once a photographer and model who were taking photos without permission. He was clicking away as a service was going on."
Even those who might be expected to know the customs inside-out, can find they have misjudged society's views. When, in June, St Mary's church, in Wimbledon Village, charged tennis fans £20 a day to park in its burial ground, it justified the decision by saying the graves were 200 years old or more. No living relatives would be offended, it said. It also gave the money to charities.
But faced with public distaste, the church called a swift halt to the scheme.
No matter how much has time has elapsed it should not affect conduct, says Canon Tim Barker.
"Churchyards are still special places - consecrated ground - whether a grave is a year old or from the 1840s, whether there are living relatives or not."
Some churchyards do fall into a state of disrepair, in Horncastle, Lincolnshire, a town church has become an antiques centre. The surrounding graveyard is now used as a public area, so the accepted conduct is more lenient.
"If a churchyard is closed for burials it may affect the public's view," says Canon Barker, "But most people know it is still somewhere to be respected and naturally adapt their behaviour."
Thursday 9 July 2009
Fundraising at West Suffolk Crematorium
Fundraising at West Suffolk Crematorium – by Royna Hill (Manager)
About a month ago I came across a leaflet describing the Tea Parties that are held every year to raise money for Marie Curie Cancer Care. As they do such a fantastic job, and we were in the middle of a heatwave, I thought it would be a good idea to have a Garden Tea Party at my home and invite family, friends and colleagues.
We started with a nice donation from my Managing Director and invested in some items to sell to raise funds. I visited Risby Fruit Farm, where Dave very kindly sold me around 40 mixed hardy fuschias at a very discounted rate. I found some little galvanised-type pots from my daughter’s wedding to put the plants in and they were ready to sell.
I then visited Westley Fruit Farms and explained about the Tea Party and they sold me some punnets of strawberries at a knock-down price – all ready for strawberries and cream at the party.
Nick Armstrong, from Armstrongs Funeral Service, gave us a donation, which I used to buy items for a couple of hampers that I could then raffle.
Philip Fuller, from Southgates of Newmarket, lent me a gazebo to create our cake tent.
Myself, Vicky and Jacqui at the crematorium baked cakes, as did my sister.
Sunday came and the weather stayed fine. We guessed how many sweets were in the jar, sold raffle tickets, had a bring and buy sale and served Afternoon Tea to our guests. The cakes and plants that weren’t sold were brought into work the next day and were sold for a donation. My sister took cakes to her work also and raised money from donations.
I have had a call today from Pat at L. Fulcher who are also giving us a donation.
So I am pleased to say, that from a very small idea, we have raised £300 to date. It is worth doing and if everyone did something similar each year, lots of money could be raised.
About a month ago I came across a leaflet describing the Tea Parties that are held every year to raise money for Marie Curie Cancer Care. As they do such a fantastic job, and we were in the middle of a heatwave, I thought it would be a good idea to have a Garden Tea Party at my home and invite family, friends and colleagues.
We started with a nice donation from my Managing Director and invested in some items to sell to raise funds. I visited Risby Fruit Farm, where Dave very kindly sold me around 40 mixed hardy fuschias at a very discounted rate. I found some little galvanised-type pots from my daughter’s wedding to put the plants in and they were ready to sell.
I then visited Westley Fruit Farms and explained about the Tea Party and they sold me some punnets of strawberries at a knock-down price – all ready for strawberries and cream at the party.
Nick Armstrong, from Armstrongs Funeral Service, gave us a donation, which I used to buy items for a couple of hampers that I could then raffle.
Philip Fuller, from Southgates of Newmarket, lent me a gazebo to create our cake tent.
Myself, Vicky and Jacqui at the crematorium baked cakes, as did my sister.
Sunday came and the weather stayed fine. We guessed how many sweets were in the jar, sold raffle tickets, had a bring and buy sale and served Afternoon Tea to our guests. The cakes and plants that weren’t sold were brought into work the next day and were sold for a donation. My sister took cakes to her work also and raised money from donations.
I have had a call today from Pat at L. Fulcher who are also giving us a donation.
So I am pleased to say, that from a very small idea, we have raised £300 to date. It is worth doing and if everyone did something similar each year, lots of money could be raised.
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